My season of inactivity has left me restless rather than restful.
My mind is overwhelmed with more questions than I can answer.
My body is left sore from the lack of proper exercise.
My veins and heart have filled with concrete and it is difficult to move.
Each step and breath is labored.
I have spent too much time in hospitals, though not for myself; I lack medical attention.
The wonders of modern medicine no longer work for me, I seek organic remedies.
I search for myself within the written word, both my own and others. I remain lost.
My lovers are my characters I’ve created within my mind.
In reality I just push everyone further and further away.
I hate being lonely, yet adore being alone.
My six month hibernation has reinforced my freedom to choose, so I go it alone.
I crave the spring, to crawl out of my cave, yet this hibernation is hard to shake.
*August 19, 2015 was the last real happy day that I can recall. After that day everything went to shit. I am trying to find my way back, past all the kicks in the head. Thank You to everyone who has stuck around. Special thanks to those to have sent messages to check on me. Extra special thanks to the one who never lets go no matter how hard I push back. I love you! XO