Thoughts of him

I cannot move past these thoughts of him

the few and rare moments we’ve had together

his eyes, his lips, his touch

his voice, I love so much

I cannot move on

to the day at hand

the routine, the mundane

I lose touch with common things

as my mind retreats

as I’m lost

in recalling memories

and I smile

at every

thought of him

 

She Hates Him

She hates him

The way a dog hates table scraps

The way a cat hates belly rubs

She hates him

She hates his every “good morning”, and his every “goodnight”
She hates the way he questions why good morning is two words and goodnight is one word

She hates how he asks about her day, every single day
How he wants to know something, good, exciting, bad or even sad – how he just wants to know

She hates the way he bosses her – telling her to be careful and safe driving home

She hates that he knows her moods without her saying a word (she hates that the most)

She hates him, like she hates to dream and fly

She hate him, but she never wants to say goodbye

A Love Story ~ The Waiting

I’ll wait for you, she says; as he boards another plane, takes another trip, goes for another ride, lays his head down for the night.  I’ll wait for you, she reminds him.  She smiles as she does.  She used to hate to wait, but she does so out of love.

He is a mover, always on the go.  She admittedly moves much more slow.  He is gone now, away again.  Another trip, someplace beautiful.  She is waiting, waking, working, writing, sleeping, breathing, and waiting some more.  She sits for hours sometimes, waiting for a bleep of the phone.

How long she’ll wait, she cannot say.  She may wait forever, or she may wait one more day.  Either way, and however it may go, she will wait as long as her heart tells her so. Right now she is waiting, for a kiss goodnight.  She is waiting for a “let’s snuggle in tight”.   She is waiting for dreams to carry her away, so she can start the waiting over again, tomorrow day.

 

Stolen Moments

Your kiss still lingers

as if it were brand new

My lips still tingle

when I think of you

My  body remembers

the feel of you against me

Stolen moments fading

between dreams and reality

Close tight my eyes

time and space erased

Holding my breath

I’m back in your embrace

Silent Reflection

It hit on the drive home
quite unexpectedly
The enormity of the world
in comparison to you and me

This overwhelming warmth
deep within my  heart
Feeling so close to you
while logistically so far apart

How is it that two people
strangers of place and time
should be lucky to meet each other
through this rhythm and rhyme

How do two hearts connect
with all this interference
in this cold, cold, world
with all this indifference

I catch my breath
my heart skips a beat
silently I reflect
on the meaning of you and me

As The World Turns

“Hello” I say into the phone, not bothering to look at caller ID.

“E-mail sucks” he almost groans.  I smile, he’s correct, I haven’t heard from him in hours.  I was getting nervous, to be honest.

I tell him as much, we chat and laugh and smile.  We are busy, we cannot stay on the phone long.  His world, my world; going one hundred miles a minute parallel to each other, intersecting on rare wonderful occasions.  The moments we live for.

I’m back to my coffee and patients, he’s back to his reports.  The world keeps turning, paying no mind to shit e-mail or moon crossed lovers who can’t go a few hours without conversation.  The world keeps mourning celebrities, abusing their own children and pampering their pets.  The world keeps advancing and falling apart at equal speed.

And me, I just want coffee, I want time with him alone, away from this world, in Neverland or on the moon, either will do.  I’m also open to other suggestions.

 

 

Wonderful Hurt

She loves him more than she knows she probably should

She couldn’t stop now, and she wouldn’t even if she could

Sure, at times the pain cuts deep and draws blood

A price she willingly pays for this love

When it hurts, it’s in the most wonderful way

Her smile starts small, then consumes her face

She prays she hurts this way for eternity

Sometimes you need the pain to be happy

 

 

A Love Story ~ In The Beginning

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In the beginning

She was apprehensive, almost standoffish.  I guess he didn’t notice or didn’t care.  He had his very own agenda which had not one single thing to do with her.  Their bad attitudes just happened to collide.

In the beginning

She thought him to be ignorant, but not in the way that one is not intelligent, she knew he was intelligent.  In the way that one is new to something.  Which he was.  He was new to this world which she was so completely consumed within.  She was both bothered and endeared with his newness.  The endearment stuck.

In the beginning

She tried every one of her tricks to push him away.  He either didn’t notice or didn’t seem to care.  Her heart skipped a beat each and every time he returned.  He seemed to both notice and care because he never stayed gone for very long. This delighted her very much.  An emotion she wasn’t much accustomed to.

In the beginning

She knew they were in big trouble.

 

Traditionally Speaking

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Kicking tradition to the side of road

he sings me a tune that I really should know

he changes the words to suit his own needs

I smile and giggle, as we do what we please

The week has been long, the month longer still

yet sitting here next to him, I’ve got time just kill

Throwing tradition right out the window

I tell him I love him, he says “yep, I know”

Traditionally speaking we don’t stand a chance

but neither of us care about pomp and circumstance

We do it Our way, rituals and customs thrown out

Each day a new adventure

because that’s what WE are about

 

 

A Love Story 04152016

The first time he saw me naked he commented about a tiny freckle on the outside of my knee.

Who notices freckles on knees?

He does, I don’t, or rather didn’t.

I didn’t notice it, had no idea what he was talking about.  He’s crazy.

The other morning as I was applying a generous amount of morning body lotion, I rubbed over a little freckle on the outside of my left knee.  I smiled out loud and said “oh, there you are.”  Don’t worry, the freckle did not reply back, but I am petty sure I heard a gentle “I told you so” whisper in my ear.

He notices freckles, and I remember the moments he does.

 

Like A Dream

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You have left me breathless once more

naked, stretched out on the floor

satisfied smile still upon my lips

as your fingers trace over my hips

And it feels like a beautiful dream

completely tangible, yet unseen

your face blurry before my eyes

your seed still dripping from my thighs

I kiss you with the rising sun

The night may be through

but the dream has just begun

Freezing Time

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Her hand trembles as she touches him

she’s dreamt of this moment,

again and again

The wait has been long

the dream,

longer still

she wants it to last

but doubts that it will

A shudder rushes through her,

she fears

much too hurried

He holds her gently

whispers

don’t be worried

Time is frozen, when our dreams collide

time is endless

when your body

touches mine

I Got The Boy

Over the Holidays I had the opportunity to catch up with an old friend of mine.  Its funny because we seemed to have “run” with the same crowds, just at different times in our lives.  The catching up that we did had less to do with ourselves and more to do with the other people that we both knew.

We fell upon the subject of an old boyfriend of mine, and the conversation went something like this…

“You know ” my friend says to me “he changed when he moved back here.”

“Changed?!” I asked

“He was different”  my friend makes a funny expression at me

“Different?!  Did I ruin him?  It didn’t end well you know.”  I frown

“I didn’t know, no body knows, no body knows anything, but you could tell.  Anyway, he turned out alright.  He is happy now.”  My friend gives me a knowing look.

“I’ve heard”  I say.

I haven’t heard, but I’ve seen pictures of him with his family.  I’ve seen him in those cumbersome suits and ties.  He looks happy, although constrained.  He looks changed.  He looks, different.

He looks like a Man, a family Man.  Not the fun loving Boy I knew and loved.  Not the Boy who would roll lemons down the side of a mountain.  Not the Boy who drove a jeep along the beach.

That’s okay, change is good.  After all, I got the Boy, and I’d take the Boy every time.

 

2015

2015
A year a personal pain
and heartache

I am burdened
with the weight
of my love
having turned to hate

My dearest friends
were dealt
a far worse fate

2015
Washed away

Rivers rising
sweeping away
Christmas gifts
and resolutions
of New Year’s Day

I’m Blessed
my family is safe
I thankfully
turn to God with Praise

2015
Has left Me
Forever
changed

This Moment

The world outside is cruel
a violent mess

Inside we shut it down a moment
read our bodies
facial cues
caress

We get lost in US
in our
pseudo reality

as our bodies touch
our minds
set free

We shut it down a moment
live while we’re alive

the world outside is cruel
for this moment
we stay inside

Kiss Me Goodnight

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Kiss me goodnight
my sweet

Kiss me goodnight
so I can sleep

Kiss me goodnight
my lover

Snuggle in close
under these covers

Dream with me
until the light of day

Kiss me goodnight

Stay
my lover
stay

Freeze Frame

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Freeze frame
as I came
as I moan
and you own
me

Freeze frame
on your face
and your cock
my eyes lock
unto you
as we do
what we do

Freeze the frame
stop time
share the rhythm
yours and mine

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

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Listed below are some of my personal pieces explaining how it feels…

Black & Blue

It Isn’t Love

Not Worth A Title

The Show Must Go On

If the Floor Drops

The Way She Laughs

Broken

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Look For Me

Look for me later
he reminds me
I’m already looking
and always will be

I look for his eyes
on every face
my heart is broken
when others can’t duplicate

I look for him
among the crowds
although my voice is silent
my soul screams his name out loud

I look for him
as I stare off into thin air
I know he is out there
somewhere

Look for me…
I’m looking Baby
I always am
and always
will be